Ten.Two Thousand, Two Hundred & Eighty-Two

1. Thursday, which means it’s almost Friday.

2. Decaf in the French press is the new favorite.

3. I look down and see a small coil of brown. A snake. A snake. A snake. He gets a dust pan and broom and sweeps it out onto the deck and beneath the railing to the hill below. I ask him if it’s the same one he saw last night. He says he doesn’t think so.

4. I show the big kid the picture of the snake and ask him if it’s the same one he saw last night. No. He doesn’t think so.

5. Forgot.

6. Out of breath, but that’s not a surprise.

7. Never not taking pictures of grape clusters.

8. No snacks, no lunch, no purse.

9. This one-on-one time is sometimes better—definitely needed.

10. Exhausted joy.

Ten.Two Thousand, Two Hundred & Eighty-One

1. Slow flow.

2. The peace of the quiet and the trees.

3. A cup of Naysayer’s Dad Joke Decaf.

4. I tell him that I miss the days when I was more in the wine than I am now.

5. “Most people are not going after what they want. Even some of the most serious goal seekers and goal setters, they're going after what they think they can get.”

6. Still the best food in town.

7. Choice.

8. My third and last time through.

9. Did you just say you saw a snake go under the fridge?

10. But he’s right. Will the change happen in only 54 days? There are only 54 days.

Ten.Two Thousand, Two Hundred & Eighty

1. Oh, so cold.

2. Morning sweat.

3. They’ve started by stripping the limbs of the trees—thick, tall brown sticks.

4. But at least he’s talking.

5. Commas. No commas. Why does this have to be so complicated?

6. I think I’m falling asleep while I’m driving, and all the chips are gone.

7. Another x-ray in a year.

8. It doesn’t have to be this way.

9. I take my headphones off because I can’t possibly be hearing what I’m hearing.

10. “I don’t have any regrets…’cause I was me.”

Ten.Two Thousand, Two Hundred & Seventy-Nine

1. Tiptoeing in the dark.

2. Early morning phone calls.

3. I’m pretty sure this coffee is too weak.

4. Good thing I read the email. Quick change. Quick drive. No water bottle. No coffee.

5. Yes. That is a model.

6. Ceasar salad, white chocolate chip macadamia nut cookie, large decaf.

7. On the plus side…

8. Good news. Different, but the same, but better.

9. Not enough time with the emails today.

10. I’m always the one to say what no one wants to hear.

Ten.Two Thousand, Two Hundred & Seventy-Eight

1. Just a few more minutes.

2. In my mind, a piece of paper. And on the paper, five columns. And inside the columns, lists of things.

3. I look up and see spider webs again for the first time in a while.

4. These views from here are always worth it.

5. All you need is a plan.

6. I slip on the dress and remember just how long I’ve had it. Clothing resale. Naperville. All those racks.

7. So distracted I can’t even write the words.

8. Where did my nose ring go?

9. But how do I want to feel?

10. Tomorrow. 5 a.m.