Ten.Two Thousand, Three Hundred & Thirty-Five
An extra hour.
A little stronger. A little more flexible. I can feel it in the movements.
A crackling fire place. Feet right in front of the hearth. A good Sunday morning.
I ask about leveling up our wardrobe. “Nicer hoodies,” he says.
I should have made time for a nap today.
So many things that I miss.
There are other things that I’d rather be doing, but alas, this is what is required of me right now. I have the next steps, but I ought to lay them out to be in step with time.
The glory of not having to cook dinner or dirty up your kitchen.
That wasn’t even our best.
“Take back your power.”
Ten.Two Thousand, Three Hundred & Thirty-Four
A little bit more time in bed.
Replaying various moments from the week before.
The first thing I see is a picture of their view of Rome.
Hair day.
Bake Off but the one with the professionals. Interrupted by questions I don’t want to answer.
Sometimes, you want to give up, but you know you can’t. You don’t really want to.
I keep sticking the pizza rolls back into the oven, but maybe there is no amount of extra cooking that will make them taste better to me.
Exhausting.
In bed by 8:30? Yes, please.
A mental list of the to-dos for tomorrow before closing my eyes. An extra blanket. The tremors are back.
Ten.Two Thousand, Three Hundred & Thirty-Three
Don’t wanna.
I peel the oranges ahead of time so that I don’t have to bother with the mess while working.
We take the truck through the vineyards. Cornflower sky and bright yellow sun. Shivering leaves in a breeze. Young vines and old vines and piles of broken vines atop dark earth.
Flu shot. My hands are too cold and so not blood is coming from the little hole they put into my finger. They do a second finger after rubbing it to get it warm. 149/90 doesn’t make sense, but I doubt the machine is lying.
There is a benefit to this.
Zero expectations.
And there we have it.
I thought it was going to be a little closer than that.
A driveway full of wood to be stacked and put away, but that means it’s almost time for the fireplace.
Excited.
Ten.Two Thousand, Three Hundred & Thirty-Two
I open up the browser, see the news, and shut it back off.
Found a new area of weakness.
More pods.
I wish I could find the inspiration.
So much wind.
I can’t believe they want $50 for this thin black shirt. Also, why am I always doing this at the last minute?
Found the energy.
I apologize for the Katy Perry. He says that he likes white girl music.
Too many new things at the same time; can’t tell what the source is.
Almost. Almost.
Ten.Two Thousand, Three Hundred & Thirty-One
Slow going.
Big appreciation for the early morning light. It feels warm.
I forgot to buy pods.
I tell her that the secret to a good cup of decaf is using the Nespresso machine. Tea is not a substitute, and drip decaf is also lacking.
I drop my ballot into the box.
I tell her she looks so very Parisian. She was going for patriotic. Oh yeah, forgot about that.
I can’t care how it looks.
I need his version of calm.
Well. I feel like crying, too.
Deep breaths.