Ten.Two Thousand, Three Hundred & Seventy-Nine
It takes me a minute to remember that the sound I am hearing is coming from the speakers. The playlist is cycling through nature sounds.
I tell him that I have a good feeling about today. Something that feels different. Something about them feels different.
So cold.
It’s always a game of how much information is too much.
Another cup of noodles while typing and trying to think of new ways to say the same things.
I think we’re more excited than scared, and that’s a much better place to be.
Thinking of all the people I need to text, email, or call. Thinking of all the things I’d like to make room in my brain to do. Seeing all the school emails popping in to remind me that the spring semester begins soon and that I need to do my FAFSA and I need to find an internship. An internship. How will I have time for an internship?
Tight game. I can see the frustration on the faces of the opposing team. That’s a good thing. We go into the locker room tied 17-17.
39-29. So close. But so far. But so close. The closest margin of defeat in 10 years is just fine. And we’re still 7-8 and 2-3, and that’s still better than we’ve been in 10 years. This is still the best team. And I think they are finally starting to believe it.
But still, there are small signs along the way that let you know you’re doing something right.
Too much adrenaline for a Tuesday night.
Ten.Two Thousand, Three Hundred & Seventy-Eight
Monday, Monday, Monday.
We settle for our 12-minute call.
How embarrassed I will be to be associated with this now.
I step outside to get my water bottle. The sun is bright, the air is crisp, and the breeze is cold.
The only thing about being in the office is too many snacks: Danish butter cookies, Hersey nuggets, sour cream and onion chips.
The theory is that if they can see it, then maybe they will better understand it. And then, maybe they will make different choices.
We walk back to the gym, and she says she’s excited. I’m excited, though I feel as though I must always temper my excitement should that excitement make everyone else nervous. But this is a different team. A better team. A winning team. And if nothing else, we will definitely not lose by 46 points again.
Did they really just do that? They really did. A little thing that is a big thing. It's amazing what a little bit of focus can do.
High fives all around.
Driving in the car with two baguettes balancing on the center console.
Ten.Two Thousand, Three Hundred & Seventy-Seven
Watching the morning light fill the room.
I read my brother’s post, and remember that he also used to write poetry. It’s a sweet, sweet reflection.
Thick socks.
Blue sky and green hills studded with mustard. A scenic drive is always good for the soul.
I feel a swell of gratitude and text to let them know how much I appreciate them. None of this would have been possible without them.
He is always so much more talkative on these Sunday afternoons and that’s how you know he’s feeling good about himself.
Still not sure how any of this is going to work out. But it will. It will?
This little mentor group always gets me so excited.
I tell them they can think big, no limits. But they say no cruises. “Noravirus. I’m not getting sick.” “Stable governments.” “There are no stable governments.”
Sunday Scaries.
Ten.Two Thousand, Three Hundred & Seventy-Six
I don’t think I’ve heard the alarm yet. I take a look at the phone. No. It’s not time.
Yoga instead of weights today - a good day.
A stop at Sunshine after drop off because sometimes you just want a drip coffee.
I tell her that I am just trying to get back to having a routine that makes me feel good.
Nerds candy.
I’m late to our lunch of tacos in the park. It is picture-perfect outside. People are trying to play pickleball, and another guy at a table is eating lunch with a small dog sitting beside him quietly.
I see what’s happening here, and I don’t think I like it.
It’s hard not to think of the fires. It’s hard not to think of your own experience of the fires. It’s hard not to think about what you would do if it happened to you again.
Just can’t do it, can you?
Sometimes, soup is all you need.
Ten.Two Thousand, Three Hundred & Seventy-Five
Work.
Bright sunshine and warm air on this Wednesday morning. Realizing that fires are more significant than I thought.
There are so many piles of clothes on the sofa.
I decide to stay in my jeans anyway because, well, I’m just more comfortable this way.
Processes.
Are three beverages too much for a 2-hour meeting? I don’t think so.
She asks me how I do it. I tell her I make it a priority; it’s just for a short time, really. And thankfully, people seem to be supportive of letting me continue with it.
Antelope = Action.
I walk in and see not just one, but three of them working. This is good. This is very good.
I hope they will get it. I hope they will understand that this is something different but just as important. Intangibles that create tangible results.