Ten.Two Hundred & Twenty-Nine

1. Thick fog and the silhouettes of trees.

2. I love what the fog means—an uptick in temperature. I can't tell if there will be any sun, but to not feel cold in the bones will be nice.

3. She says she's going to be running late. I'm happy. It gives me a few more moments alone to quiet myself. I run to the grocery store to buy a banana, a Naked juice, a bottle of water, a venti smoked butterscotch latte made with coconut milk. I am better now. I feel normal now.

4. I can feel myself dozing off in the chair even as my scalp is being pulled into three different directions. 

5. Leftover chicken noodle soup and a bag of fruit snacks before a nap. 

6. I at least manage to get the bathrooms cleaned and upstairs vacuumed before the babysitter arrives. She's late. This one is always late. But she can also drive herself.

7. I go for the duck breast and he goes for a pork chop. We decide on a Burgundy from Côte de Beaune that was served way too warm. We're probably the only people at this restaurant asking for their red wine to be chilled down. We decide that we're the worst kind of restaurant guests. Spoiled may be a better word for it. This is what happens when your foodie husband goes from being in the restaurant business to being in the wine business and all of the learning and experiences that come of it. So maybe not spoiled. Maybe "blessed."

8. I leave tomorrow. I am always anxious about travelling. So much energy spent on self-talk to calm the nerves.

9. I haven't even left and I'm already missing them. Isn't that funny. I so desperately am ready for and needing this break, and yet I'm already sad. One of the many paradoxes of parenting.

10. Tomorrow.