Ten.Three Hundred & Ninety-Three

1. The smell of something burning. One piece of deep dish sausage at 450 degrees.

2. 4:30 alarm.  

3. 5:30 alarm. I listen for birds. The windows are open and the air is cool. I close my eyes again.  

4. We talk price and market and strategy before we’ve even had coffee. 

5. I sweat in the corner but I refuse to move. Something about the heat and the light feels cleansing on a day like today. I set the sprinkler out and the drops that land on my forehead feel good.

6. We watch them leave and wonder if they were the ones that canceled. 

7. It's just that there isn't enough energy for words. I feel tired but too restless to sleep. 

8. One large monarch butterfly floating from to flower to flower. So much grace.

9. Then we realize what has happened and it's hard to turn off the emotion. Anger plus frustration added to the anxiety. 

10. I will feel better in the morning.