Ten.Four Hundred & Five

1. That screaching bird again. 

2. There are more tomatoes to be picked. I will need to make a meal plan to accommodate all of them. Salads and sauces and simply sliced and sprinkled with salt for a snack.  

3. I can feel the soreness in my rib cage and underneath my arm pits and across my shoulder blades. It’s a welcomed feeling.  

4. I go to the store at 6:30 am to buy the school supplies I never ordered because I didn’t expect us to still be here. I find every last thing and a huge weight is lifted from my shoulders.  

5. I do a deeper clean today-dust the baseboards and wipe down the doors. School begins on Wednesday and I expect another weekend of no showings, but I’m trying to stay faithful to routine so as to be prepared. Trying to always be prepared.  

6. We take the older two to a sleepover at a friends and then head out to run work errands. I had forgotten how much I like fancy grocery stores. I buy a magazine, “Women and Weed,” because I am curious about this. Because I got the message that I needed to know how to be in charge of my own healing. The cashier tells me she hopes it becomes a thing. That she wishes her dad who died of cancer could have had the option to use cannibus instead all the other awful drugs his HMO allowed.  

7. The three of us eating together reminds me of when he was in pre-school and would join us for lunch. Always so eager to hang out. Always pleasant. Always grateful. The babies of the family are just different.  

8. Sancerre and seafood.  

9. Movie night with just him. Popcorn and gummi fish in the bed. Jumanji on the screen.  

10. The original was better. I am becoming my parents. I prefer the older versions of everything.