Ten.Four Hundred & Forty-Four

1. A dream that I am pregnant with twins. It is true that there is a lot of internal work waiting to be birthed.

2. Pain in those back teeth. It’s the clenching. I just need to go get that mouth guard. I just need to figure out how to relax those muscles. What am I holding in the lining of my jaw?

3. Why am I reheating two different kinds of foods? Maybe this thermos thing was not a good idea.

4. Difficult conversations in which I have no say. At least I feel like I shouldn’t have a say. I think of how in the text message I said that I'm pretty non-committal these days. I’m just a little un-tethered.

5. It’s funny to me how I went from being overly anxious about the sale of the home to almost not caring. I mean I do care. I care every time I get another piece of paper from the school reminding me of some future event. I care when the kids ask. I care when I want to go run an errand but the house is a little messy and I have to straighten it just a bit before I leave. But I also don’t care.

6. It’s time to trade out this green wreath for something with more yellow and orange.

7. I want to stop and collect all of the leaves. Fiery maple leaves, dozens of them, scattered all over the sidewalk.

8. I can’t read to read this little book of wisdom.

9. We decide on a collection of essays by Wendell Berry. I’m looking forward to reading this.

10. Sudden changes in vision.