Ten.Five Hundred & Twenty-Six

1. What day is it? Sunday. Oh, yes. Okay.

2. I let myself sleep in but it leads to anxiety about the to-do list for today. I need to go grocery shopping but I still need to make a meal plan for the week. But I also don’t know what this week is going to look like with this new job stuff. I’ll keep it simple.

3. I think I’m recording a message to her but look down and see that I accidentally stopped it 10 minutes ago. Is it a sign? Or should I jus re-record myself?

4. He keeps asking me if I am finding what I need.

5. The fog is still hanging low and there is a bright gray hue over everything. What grapes could they possibly be growing here? They all look head trained so most likely Zinfandel? The colors of the leaves are breathtaking.

6. Second store. Still slowly walking up and down the aisles. My eyes begin to swell with tears. I can’t find anything that I’m looking for. At least not a the price that I want to pay for it. Nothing feels familiar. I’ve been gone almost two hours already. They are tears of frustration. I’ll eventually figure it out.

7. Sometimes the feelings just leak out when you least expect it.

8. Two cups of tea and a long nap.

9. Salmon, risotto, asparagus. No one seems to be as hungry as I am.

10. Nervous. Is “nervous” the same thing as “scared”? I’ll be okay.