Ten.Eight Hundred & Ninety-Nine

1. I should just get up, even though I don’t want to.

2. Am I overthinking it all?

3. The truth is that there are some things I want to return to. But there is no way to go back and undo what is done. And it’s not that I really need to leave, it’s just that I have yet find what will replace what I’m longing for. And I don’t exactly know how to reach those longings except through the passage of time.

4. So dark, so quiet. I do not wish to wake them though I must.

5. I roll my eyes at the car who will not let me through because I know that we will just meet again at the next merge.The dance of the daily commute.

6. Waiting.

7. I lean back in the chair and stare at the ceiling. I take a deep breath. “You look just how I feel.” “I’m just trying to clear my mind so that I can come up with a solution.” I laugh then pull myself back to the desk and get to work.

8. Maybe it’s by alphabetical order.

9. I thank him for answering my questions so that when I’ve been presented with things like this I know the right answers.

10. “Backward I see in my own days where I sweated through fog with/ linguists and contenders,/ I have no mockings or arguments, I witness and wait.” - from “Song of Myself” by Walt Whitman