Ten.Nine Hundred & Fifty-Two

1. Seriously?

2. I try to slow my breath and clear my thoughts so that I can get at least one more hour of sleep. Just one more hour.

3. Still uneasy.

4. I had forgotten how much worse traffic is earlier in the morning but I need to get there. I’ll be more productive without the distraction anyway.

5. It’s good to hear her voice. I’m grateful for the opportunity to vent. To not have any answers.

6. He says what I thought he would say. I am nothing but nerves. Shaky. I step outside. The sun feels good. I go inside. Inside does not feel good. I take a walk to the other side of the property. It’s still quiet. I lean against the wine barrel and stare out over the vineyard and the hills and the blue sky.

7. Just not in the mood.

8. Still nothing and that makes me even more upset, makes me feel even more justified in my choice.

9. It’s a cute play. Some of us are more into it than others.

10. His optimism makes all of this a lot easier.